Holistic Health

Things began to change in my teens.  I started to get some episodes of being 'taken offline' - exhaustion would hit me apparently from nowhere.

What I didn't realise at the time was that my whole being was aiming for balance - I just didn't really know it on a conscious level.

As is usual for teenagers, with the encouragement of friends, I began to explore things like tea leaves, psychomantriums, etc., and found that we could produce some uncanny experiences.

I had detested school right from my first day of primary school.  I think - even now - that despite what some read as a calm exterior sometimes (which I am always shocked by, because I run what feels like very fast energy) if I was put through the school system today, I would probably be diagnosed with ADHD, and I probably do have ADHD in some format, I think my Dad probably had some form of aspergers too, as well as elements of addictive personality traits.

So I had this bizarre experience of doing quite well in school and yet hating it; this schism of being utterly out of place, and out of rhythm with everything.  I was very much a freespirited person who put her head down to get through it all, but detested nearly every moment.  I also always felt positively ancient compared to everyone else.  I feel my actual age is somewhere around 82!  So on some level, I actually haven't grown into my age yet.  (very funny, I know)

When I was 13 some mysterious illness affected me, my blood counts went all out of sorts, and I was off school for 2 weeks; I had a type of fatigue that seemed to come up from the very bowels of hell itself, and gravity became ten times stronger.
My emotions became much more vulnerable.  I was sent back to school to continue to plough on, except this time I continued with the extreme fatigue.

With an altered energy, altered body I continued to push until I collapsed at the age of 16, when I was ultimately diagnosed with PVFS, and the full alchemical process of awakening began.